I arrived in Germany. I have a ton of things to do for work. Had a work meeting that I was literally counting the prep hours for.
My cousin wanted me to visit her right away.
My sister wanted to know about plans.
I got nothing, folks!
I’m struggling with life.
You’re just gonna have to deal.
I spent this second day sleeping and working. I called everyone who mattered: “I’m drowning! I’ll get you when I get to you.
Working - the more I get done, the less I need to get done next week when my sister will want my time.
I am at my brother’s house - finding my way around his place. The bathroom, the bedroom, the office. They left enough food to get me through a few days. I will have to find food soon - unless I raid their freezer.
Would you just hand your house to your sibling? I would do so in a heartbeat - and apparently, my brother is doing the same.
Being here is interesting. This is my brother’s second marriage, his second home. His second in-law family - and this one took.
He’s living in a house with his wife. The mother-in-law and his stepdaughter (and her family) have houses on the same lot - 3 houses on one plot of land within feet of each other and it works, because they’re all good people who understand how to create community.
The mother in law showed up when I was sitting outside on the back porch: “Oh, you’re here already.” We chatted for a little while. Then the daughter showed up. She had picked up her 2 year old from kindergarten and was coming home.
“Urma, I am supposed to remind you of your shot.” says the stepdaughter as she walks up. “Yes, thank you. I need to do that now.” is the reply.
The little guy wants to go into my brother’s house to see his Oma. He’s told that they’re on vacation - that Elsie is here instead. He knows about the vacation and we chat a little about his world.
After we talked for a little while, everyone wanders back into their home to make dinner and take the necessary shots.
It’s an interesting set-up. They’re right there. I could walk over - and would be welcome to do so - at any moment. But boundaries being what they are. That’s not what people do. Because they respect each other’s privacy.
My birth family was a well functioning family and my brother married into such a family, too. I married into a mess of an abusive clan and the result was what I got.
Walking through this house is interesting. The house has the wife’s touch all over it, but it a house that screams ‘couple’. Evidence of what the pair have done together is everywhere. That’s their thing: They travel and experience things together.
Maps on the walls reflect that, little his and hers knick-knacks that they brought from somewhere.
It’s a happy house, reflection of a happy marriage. These two are making it work.